tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-83500363473237531352024-03-05T15:44:09.081-08:00Diary of a Death FiendThe inane rantings of a lunatic mind, or Artist Morbideus W. GoodellMorbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.comBlogger57125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-80447969268692896662014-09-30T03:47:00.001-07:002014-09-30T03:47:27.430-07:00Catch of the Day Fridays<span id="docs-internal-guid-7454ccb4-c62a-6a23-c488-27bd69b069e6"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Brought to you by Big Bob’s Mystery Meat Barbecue, and Catch of the Day Fridays. Guess the catch of the day and win a free rack of ribs. This week’s hint: It’s dog. </span></span>Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-45384078588352990322014-08-15T22:07:00.001-07:002014-08-15T22:07:48.555-07:00Depression DefinedDepression:<br />
<br />
Depression is compounded sypathy for yourself.<br />
<br />
It starts with feeling bad,<br />
then feeling bad for yourself,<br />
for feeling badly.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-84214947062091840522014-08-02T07:20:00.001-07:002014-08-02T07:20:31.754-07:00Morning VisionI got a big suprise<br />
<br />
when I opened my eyes.<br />
<br />
I didn't know<br />
<br />
that they were closed.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-91227139657148513822014-07-26T20:31:00.002-07:002014-07-26T20:31:40.510-07:00Food PreservationRefrigerators are man-made creations, which keep food fresh by keeping it cold.<br />
<br />
Animals are natural creations which keep food fresh by keeping it warm.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-51589488668224245982014-07-17T06:46:00.003-07:002014-07-17T06:46:49.255-07:00Oh, That Silly Jesus"The only way to Heaven is through me." he is reported to have said.<br />
<br />
Is that like; "If you think you're going to Heaven, you'll have to go through me first!!" or; The only way you idiots are going to Heaven is OVER MY DEAD BODY!!".<br />
<br />
Sounds like he may have been a bit unsettled.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-3257375170702446632014-07-07T04:46:00.001-07:002014-07-17T06:47:03.585-07:00Immorality of ImmortalityThe often posed question: What would you do with Immortality?<br />
<br />
I thought about it. I suppose at some point I would tire of life, and unble to die myself, I would go on a killing spree. When that got old, I would realize that wasn't too cool, that life is precious, and begin to value humanity for it's fragility.<br />
<br />
Knowing that at the onset, however, wouldn't stop it from all happening, because, you know, Immortality has a way of making people a little cookoo.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-7728402687133861212014-06-27T07:07:00.001-07:002014-06-27T07:07:08.179-07:00The Upside of Ebola<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ebola_virus" target="_blank">Ebola</a>, there is an outbreak taking place in Africa right now. Nasty, nasty incurable disease, inspiration for Sreven King's The Stand, and has a 90% mortality rate. Call me kookey, but I find the fact that 10% of those infected survive kind of encouraging. I guess that makes me a "Glass-half-full" kind of guy.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-33434452244473394572014-06-24T07:05:00.000-07:002014-06-24T07:05:07.335-07:00Thought for the DayIs it true you can blind-fold a one-eyed-pixie with a band-aid?Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-47864651845478537672014-06-19T06:58:00.001-07:002014-06-19T06:59:51.810-07:00Species Identity DisorderThis is tongue-in-cheek, with a lot of truth in it.:<br />
<br />
Often, in my dreams, I run on four legs. I'll start by running up a hill, and begin using my hands, and thennext thing I know, I'm at the top and just keep going that way.<br />
<br />
Or, I'm running, and it's just not fast enough. I leap forward, and start going on four-legs, and get the speed I need. It feels very natural, and happens very often.<br />
<br />
I think I have species Identity disorder. Please call me Fido. The Species re-assignment Surgery is going to be a bitch!Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-89081727702269858302014-06-11T04:02:00.002-07:002014-06-11T04:02:25.117-07:00Super Power.It's been a long running question in the minds of many people:<br />
<br />
"If you could have a super-power, what would it be?"<br />
<br />
I finally have my answer. I would like the power of having mosquitoes explode upon contact with my blood. Not a dynamite-level explosion, pop-rock level would be fine.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-26500306845660741352014-05-31T08:00:00.000-07:002014-05-31T08:00:02.745-07:00Marketing SuckerI was speaking with Raven (my Guru), about commercialism and marketing. It's odd that certain products, like hair-removal devices, are generally marketed toward women, but will offer a second version, usually in black or grey packaging, for men. It's the same product, does marketing like that really matter? Then Raven (my Guru) pointed out that I am no better. She claimed I'll buy just about anything if it is colored black, and had flames or skulls on it. Even something pointless I don't need, like a rubber duck. She when on, and said more words, or something, I'm not really sure what she was talking about or where she was going with any of it, but a black rubber duck with flames and skulls on it... that would be cool. I'd totally buy that.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-40358365686619480952014-05-28T03:36:00.000-07:002014-05-31T07:59:23.109-07:00Too Many ChoicesKids today, with their "I'm male or female, or transsexual, or pansexual, asexual, etc." Too many choices. When I was that age, we knew there are only two choices: <span style="color: #cc0000;">Suicide or Homicide</span>. Everything else was bullshit.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-32322266255666664132014-05-24T08:21:00.000-07:002014-05-24T08:21:02.474-07:00And the Dwarf Kept Tumbling Down...Dream...<br />
<br />
I'm standing in the middle of a road, not a car in site.<br />
<br />
My Wife tells me to get out of the road, or I could get hit by a car.<br />
<br />
What car? There are no cars on this road. I turn toward one of the directions, gesturing "come and get me," daring any car to flatten me.<br />
<br />
I feel something brush against the back of my legs. Turning quickly, there is a small, yellow, square shaped van. It's electric (no wonder I didn't hear it coming!) and it's small. Very small. Like two feet high and two feet wide. I think the driver is pissed at me, for almost causing an accident. The van stops, backs up quickly, slamming into the guard-rail. It pulls forward, then makes a u-turn and starts backing up again, very quickly. I suspect someone small wants to give me a big piece of their mind.<br />
<br />
So angry they are, they don't notice a break in the guard-rail, and the mini-mini van tumbles down the side of a rocky cliff.<br />
<br />
"Crap!" I say, this person could be hurt.<br />
<br />
I begin a careful ascent down the cliff. The van, fortunately, stopped part-way down. I'm trying to get to it, when the door opens, and little man gets out. He's bald, and looks hurt.<br />
<br />
"Hang on!" I tell him, I'm coming, I'll pull him up.<br />
<br />
He stumbles, loses his balance, and falls further down the cliff, into a small chasm in the rocks. I'm climbing into the chasm, I can see him, he looks slightly more injured. I get closer to him, he loses his grip, falling further.<br />
<br />
I go down even more cautiously. He loses his footing, and falls again. This time he hits the bottom, hard. That looks like it hurt! He appears to still be alive. I don't dare try to move him, in case he has a spinal injury or broken neck. No point in climbing all the way down there.<br />
<br />
"I'll get help!" I yell to him. Climbing back up, I'll call 911 as soon as I get to the surface. I'm hoping he won't be still angry with me. It's not my fault he went off the cliff. and I climbed down trying to help in, even if I did laugh every time he fell further down, because it really looked quite comical.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-16077935185282882232014-05-17T08:25:00.000-07:002014-05-17T08:25:21.329-07:00Mind Over Matter of DegreesI finally have my Collage Degree.<br />
<br />
The powers that be have granted me a B.S. in Theoretical Philosophy, in recognition of extensive work in the field. I hope to earn my Masters before too long.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-43961361028554287072014-05-13T03:27:00.004-07:002014-05-13T03:27:56.126-07:00Does this look funny to you?Just noticed the other day that I have a little spot on my lip. I figure it's either absolutely nothing, or lip cancer. If it is lip cancer, I'd probably need to get my lips removed. If I get my lips removed, I'd need to get some of those tooth-whitening strips, or else it might look funny.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-89574900771102697432012-01-25T15:15:00.000-08:002012-01-25T15:15:55.314-08:00Like me on FacebookI heard tell that everyone who is anyone is on Facebook. Being as I was not, I began to be concerned if I didn't get on soon, I may cease to exist.<br />
<br />
Please give me a "Like" @ <br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.facebook.com/MorbideusWGoodell">www.Facebook.com/MorbideusWGoodell</a><br />
<br />
By the way, that will be the only place on the web where I'll be posting most recent Artwork, sketches and failures. I weed out my best stuff for my <a href="http://www.morbideusgallery.com/" target="_blank">regular site</a>.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-57729025976110231162010-10-12T16:29:00.000-07:002010-10-12T16:52:27.900-07:00Where the heck have I been?!?!?I just checked this Blog and saw that I haven't posted in close to a year! That's just wrong... BAD! BAD BLOGGER!! There's been PLENTY going on, (or has gone on) and I have been negligent at documenting any of it...<br />
<br />
It's not like ridiculous things don't happen to me on a regular basis, they certainly do. I <em>have</em> been posting on Facebook once in a while, but that doesn't count.<br />
<br />
For one thing: In Maine, after huntin' season ended last year, I was able to get a good deal on a bunch of "hunter-orange" baseball style caps. check out <br />
<a href="http://www.postmortem-prod.com/hallowedhats.html">http://www.postmortem-prod.com/hallowedhats.html</a> <br />
I've started marketing my hand-painted hats. Only jack-o-lantern style right now, more to come.<br />
<br />
See that!?!? I make my first post in close to a year, and what do I do? Try to peddle more of my stuff. I'm such a whore....Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-37816225163694233542009-10-26T11:11:00.000-07:002009-10-26T12:19:05.675-07:00Salem Report: 2009"I love Salem in October, it's like Days of the Dead meets Mardi-Gras."<br /><br />Morticia and I did our yearly jaunt to Salem MA yesterday, it was great to see Matt and Mara (proprietors of <a href="http://www.foolsmansion.com/">www.FoolsMansion.com</a>) as well as artist Nick Demakes and his cephalopod (lol!)girlfriend Christina. Fun group, I wish we lived closer.<br /><br />In addition dropping off a bunch of prints and artwork to The Fool's Mansion, we also picked up a brand new vender in Salem, "Life & Death, Oddities and Curios Shop" <a href="http://www.lifeanddeathinsalem.com/">www.lifeanddeathinsalem.com</a> they sell Absinthe supplies, Post Mortem items (funerary, not US) and "Dreadful rarities". A shop not to be missed in you are cruising around Salem looking for a memorable experience!Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-27826227902490137632009-10-12T15:09:00.000-07:002009-10-12T15:14:37.885-07:00A Mesage From Universal Management<div align="center">Due to unforseen circumstances beyond our control, </div><div align="center">tomorrow has been cancelled. </div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center"></div><div align="center">In an attempt to compensate, today has been moved</div><div align="center"> to "Never Ending" status.</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center"></div><div align="center">We apologize for any inconveniences this may cause. </div>Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-33678054881226272362009-09-22T12:08:00.000-07:002009-09-22T12:13:37.343-07:00A Funny Thing...A little something I wrote years ago, still true to this day...<br /><br /><strong><span style="font-size:130%;">A Funny Thing</span></strong><br /><br />I often tell stories which I think are funny.<br />That's why I tell them, I think they are funny.<br /><br />A funny thing is,<br />The people I often tell these stories to <em>don't</em> think they are funny, and therefore don't understand just why I told it to them in the first place.<br /><br />And the fact that I often tell stories which I think are funny,<br />to people who don't think they are funny,<br />I think is hysterical!<br />---MwGMorbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-26771282650291488352009-08-24T09:46:00.001-07:002009-08-24T09:52:45.595-07:00The Art Festival is over...The WCSH-6 Portland Sidewalk Art fesstival (annum#44) is over. The whole thing went pretty well, and I learned a few things:<br /><br />1. If a guy is looking at a print like he may consider buying it, don't talk to his girlfriend.<br /><br />2. When someone asks about the price for an original piece, start high.<br /><br />3. AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING: Bring tape. If I had to borrow someone else's tape one more time, I risked punching my own self in the face.<br /><br />But all in all, it was a good show. People seemed to really like the new "Dead Man's Chest" piece that I recently completed, and "Nacht der Geist" as well as "No Hear Say or See" & Cutey-Die are still popular. I love that.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-51313823976211544182009-08-24T09:38:00.000-07:002009-08-24T09:45:50.270-07:00Disposable WorldSo many of the things that we see and use every day are made not be disposed of. Things aren't made to last as they once were, it's all fodder for the ever-growing Waste Stream Monster.<br /><br />This is a fact, I know it, you know it. Which raises the question: Why do I save so much crap?!? I am a sucker for saving, glueing, taping and trying to get every last once of life out of everything I use. I had this epiphony which stacking paperwork: I have boxes of paperclips right next to me, yet found myself twisting and trying to bend out another use from a paperclip that had clearly been used several times before. WHY DO I DO THIS? For the Environment? Because I'm a cheap bastard?? Is it OCD?!?<br /><br />I don't know, but I am going to make an effort to treat more disposable things as the garbage they were meant to be. I'm starting with a BRAND-NEW PAPERCLIP!!!Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-57343169923209517582009-08-17T11:57:00.000-07:002009-08-17T12:49:36.688-07:00"It's a Morbid Life" pt. 1It dawned on me recently that so many strange things take place in my life, that I hardly notice them anymore. I don't even realize how strange they <em>are</em> until I tell them to people and they give me "<em>That look</em>," that always inspires me to question if I should be telling this stuff to anyone.<br /><br />Therefore I'll chronicle them here....<br /><br /><span style="color:#009900;">The Selling of the Pants:</span><br /><br />Winter, 2004, the middle of a snowstorm.<br /><br />Some dear friends (who know I'm a little "off") gave me a gift of a pair of or pants. They were "lounging pants," (which I suspect is a scam to sell the pants from a pair of pajamas). They were dark blue, with glow-in-the-dark panets and moons on them. Pretty snazzy, and I'm sure never intended for wear outside the house. So I was wearing them in the middle of a snowstorm to go and pick up pizza.<br /><br />As I croosed the parking lot to go into Lumpy's Pizza in North Berwick (no longer there, but you ever get a time machine, I strongly suggest giving them a try). As I entered the fine eating establishment, an older gentlemen (who I'd never seen before) commented that he liked my pants. I thanked him and went to continue my transaction. Then he asks: "How much?"<br /><br />I told him I did not know, they were a gift. He said, "No, how much do you want for them?" and took out a roll of bills...<br /><br />I saw the cash and said "$50". He handed me a $50 bill, and I took the pants off and handed them to him. Right there inside Lumpy's Pizza.<br /><br />It was a cold ride home, I'm glad my coat was fairly long.Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-29760537806036318712009-08-05T13:05:00.000-07:002009-08-24T09:58:34.177-07:00Art Festival August 22I will be taking part in the 44th Annual WCSH 6 Sidewalk Art Festival to be August 22, 2009 (raindate August 23). Approximately 300 artists and 40,000 visitors attend this festival. The WCSH 6 Sidewalk Art Festival is the oldest and largest one-day art show in Northern New England.<br /><br />For more info: <a href="http://www.wcsh6.com/life/community/events/art_festival/story.aspx?storyid=100584&catid=126" target="_blank">http://www.wcsh6.com/life/community/events/art_festival/story.aspx?storyid=100584&catid=126</a>Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8350036347323753135.post-87065552641221562602009-07-28T13:33:00.000-07:002009-07-28T13:43:28.412-07:00Remembering Michael JacksonSince it's been <span style="font-size:130%;">everywhere, </span><span style="font-size:100%;">I want to take this opportunity to reflect on my favorite Michael Jackson Moment....</span><br /><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><object height="340" width="560"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/GVJzf3aQLLI&hl=en&fs=1&"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/GVJzf3aQLLI&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object></span>Morbideushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08541581002748385082noreply@blogger.com0